27 November 2008

the holiday table

will be groaning under the weight of tonight's feast. which is:

roasted turkey breast (w/ oil and herbs and wot not under the crispy skin)
sourdough sausage stuffing (not in the bird tho, that's a hospital trip waiting to happen)
my figure-friendly mashed potatoes (ha! heavy cream and butter?)
wild mushroom gravy (made w/ chicken stock i made myself!)
butter-braised baby brussels sprouts
cranberry sauce (see my previous post... the black pepper is the making of it, trust)
butterflake rolls
pumpkin pie w/ maple whipped cream

yeah... i'll be eating nothing but salad for a few days probably.

i hope you and yours have a lovely meal, wonderful conversation, and a long list of things to be thankful for.

much to be thankful for

i've seen people list ten things they're thankful for.

1. i'm thankful i've had wendell in my life for five and a half years. life has made sense in a way it didn't before i knew him. there's been lots to get through, and we've brought out the best in each other.

2. i'm thankful that i can laugh so hard i can't breathe. it happened last night. my brother came along for the ride. we were gonna invent a gluten-free tofu turducken. turns out it's call a tofucken and it HAS to have gluten. but thanks for the smoke stef!

3. i'm thankful that someone with half a brain won the election on the 4th. i'm also glad he's been doing a press conference or fireside chat every day lately. the country needs assurance right now, and our current occupant's only official activity yesterday was pardoning the damn turkey.

4. i'm thankful i have my health. oh, i've whined aplenty lately about my various ailments (and i'm adding arthritis to the mix... my right knee's been causing me grief lately), but i'm really fine. no major problems, and i could have a grip of them with the genes i inherited.

5. i'm thankful i've finally worked up the nerve to quit smoking. smoking killed my mother at 62. i have a marriage that isn't miserable and i'd like to get to live as long with wendell as my mom was stuck with my dad. they were married almost 39 years. that'd make me 74, and that's not long enough.

6. i'm thankful i learned the trick about adding just a wee bit of black pepper to my cranberry sauce. that and vanilla, again just a skosh.. like a capful. oh, and grand marnier. or cointreau. but especially the pepper. going back to the shit in the can that jiggles isn't an option.

7. i'm thankful my brother has decided he likes brussels sprouts.

8. i'm thankful the house hasn't fallen in on us. there's any number of things wrong with this place, shit that should have been dealt with before it was (re)listed. if it sold it wouldn't pass an inspection. but it's still here, even with the wind and shit we've had lately, and for that i'm thankful.

9. i am thankful that my dad lives in michigan. i don't have to explain that one, do i?

10. i'm thankful i still have my three loyal readers. they're all people i'd have a beer with if they didn't live at least 2,000 miles away... have a beer and listen to some tunes... perhaps burn one. they provoke me in ways they'll never know. make me think things i might not have otherwise. stretching out is good for more than just the body.

19 November 2008


kona is to blame -

the roolz:
1. post your list of the seven best albums, the seven bloggers you will tag, a copy of these rules, and a link back to this page. (what page? see #2.)
2. the trackback links for these things are always fucking broken, so fuck the rest of the rules he posted.
4. post a link back to the blogger who tagged you.

k, seven's a bitch. i could easily name 70. these are 7 that i listened to today. they are in no particular order, and some of them might have a comment or 2.

1. louder than bombs - the smiths
2. fables of the reconstruction - r.e.m.
3. rage against the machine (they opened for pearl jam at the palladium and tossed out copies of this on cassette. i was floored.)
4. nevermind - nirvana.
5. doolittle - pixies
6. 10,9,8,7,6,5,4,3,2,1 - midnight oil (this is what opened my eyes politically speaking. i think i was 13 when i first heard it... it had a huge impact on me.)
7. dummy - portishead (omg the times this cd got me laid.)

now comes the hard part... picking seven peeps to foist this upon.

1.kona ok... give me seven more!
4.dr. doug
5.lebowski urban achiever
6.heidi rude
7.american guy

15 November 2008

the devil wind

it's actually the santa ana winds, but i think i understand why they're sometimes called the devil wind... it smells rather like hell.

we're about 12 mi from the westernmost parts of the two fires burning locally. one started in the west end of corona, and cinders from that fire caught in yorba linda. a separate fire started in brea, and given the topography out there, they could very well merge.
we won't ever be in actual danger from these fires, ie we're ordered to evacuate... but fuck is it ever nasty here. the house is closed up, and the a/c is coming on about once an hour for about 15 mins.

check out these pics:

the above pics were taken about 12:30. notice the ash gathering in the corner of my bro's back window? notice the palm tree blowing?

the last three were taken about 2:00 pm. notice how much nastier it got in 2 hrs time? and how the area of blue sky has actually gotten bigger? wen'l thinks there's some sort of weird inversion happening. i think he might be right.

02 November 2008

november 4th

two days from now. if you haven't already voted (and aren't planning to tomorrow), make sure you get out and vote. i know most people say something like, "i don't care who you vote for, just vote." fuck that. i care who you're voting for. i want a president who says it's ok to have a lover's quarrel with your country. (wish i could remember who said that on maher the other night. i'd give em snaps.)

november 4th is also my 4th anniversary. wen'l and i got married 2 days after the chimperor was "re-elected". i want more than anything else to celebrate barack obama having won the election. we're poor, and about to be more so, what with the medical and dental bills i'll be racking up. we're exchanging presents, but we had a small budget. we're staying home for dinner and i'm making spaghetti con polpette. part of me wants to say fuck it and buy a bottle of champagne, even though i'd have to massage my budget for the rest of the month.

so i will be there, at lord baden-powell elementary, bright-eyed and bushy-tailed, tuesday morning. i am not a morning person, and i will have to get up about 530 i think. much coffee will have to be consumed, and probably a bracing shower too. but i wouldn't miss this for anything. not only do i have to vote for obama, i have to vote no on a proposition on our ballot. the state of california cannot be in the business of making denying an entire group of people's civil rights part of our constitution. i haven't noticed more straight people filing for divorce since same-sex marriage became legal here. apparently, the institution isn't in danger as a result.

so, i better go get dinner out of the oven. if you live in california, please vote no on proposition 8, and no matter where else you live (in the US anyway), please vote for barack obama. if my 70 year old, lifelong republican aunt is, so can you.

i admit it. i choked up.

don't mind the credits.

30 October 2008

when it rains, it pours


i have to have my upper wisdom teeth extracted. i had a dental emergency the other morning, and went to dr. papazian. he sed they had to go. referred me to an oral/maxillofacial surgeon over in long beach. my consult and panoramic x-ray is the 12th.

get this - the thing in my parotid gland will probably show up in this x-ray. i will definitely be informing the doc of all my recent medical adventures at my consultation.

i wish i'd had the damn things taken out when i was a kid, before they ever came in. my ma had killer dental insurance back then. they paid like 75% on my orthodontia killer. instead, they started coming in around the time i was 27. my bottom ones have never fully erupted, but the upper ones did.I probably haven't been as diligent about the hygiene as i should have been, but these teeth are right against my tonsils (another relic i'm still equipped w/), and i gag like a bitch most of the time.

the bottom ones should come out eventually too, but thus far they're ok. no cavities or much decay, and they can wait.

i tried to have this all done a couple years ago, when wen'l and i had dental ins. the damn company denied my claim. that pissed my dentist off to no end. "they weren't pathological?" he almost seethed! the place the ins. co. would have wanted to do the damn procedure scared the shit out of me though. perhaps it's a good thing i'll be having it done by this guy.

i heart my dentist. i always have. he didn't charge me for the visit, or for the x-rays he took to give this surgeon. i just hope the dude will work out some sort of payment plan with me.

28 October 2008

primus sucks

too many puppies are being shot in the dark.
too many puppies are trained not to bark.
at the sight of blood that must be spilled so that
we may maintain our oil fields.
too many puppies
too many puppies are taught to heal.
too many puppies are trained to kill.
on the command of men wearing money belts that buy
mistresses sleek animal pelts.
too many puppies.
too many puppies with guns in their hands.
too many puppies in foreign lands.
are dressed up sharp in suits of green and
placed upon the war machine.
too many puppies are just like me.
too many puppies are afraid to see.
the visions of the past brought to life again,
too many puppies, too many dead men.

that's from 1990, people. located on "frizzle fry", an album that was called the bastard child of dr. seuss and frank zappa.

20 October 2008


lest you think my mind is all on myself tonight, it's not. tonight i heard the number i've been dreading for months - keith olbermann said tonight that it was the 2000th day since the declaration of mission accomplished.

i have a cousin over there.

there are much worse things in the world, even in my tiny one, than a tumor in my parotid gland.

sometimes i wish i were the kind of person who prays. sometimes, when things are really bad, i have a conversation with my late cousin stephen. (who died from a lack of health care btw. i remember all too well and it makes me scared in a way i can't adequately explain.). this conversation occurs only in my mind, but i remember having a very frank talk with him a few weeks before he suddenly died, and it brought me a very profound peace. i suppose it makes some sense that an atheist like me would have to have a vent (if you will) like that. i haven't yet had that conversation with him, so things can't be as bad as i was afraid.

stephen's been gone for 14 years now. the ache i feel at his absence is much deeper than what i feel for my own mother. that may sound pretty fucked up, but i'd known for 9 years that it was going to happen with her. he was alive, and a day later he wasn't. i think it's his being snatched away from us like that left a mark on me that will never go away.

i got to (just) long enough to say that life is long. trust me, even when i'm whining about how fucked up things are, i am incredibly grateful i've gotten to be here long enough to earn saying that.

fuck me

well, the doc called this afternoon about quarter till five and said i need to get a ct scan of this thing, my "suspicious" parotid gland. too bad i had to blow the $ on the damn ultrasound to find that out. it might have provided me with a down payment on the damn thing if nothing else.

so i have to go pick up the report from her and take it an ent, who will invariably schedule the super-expensive test.

two things:

1. i'd be considerably less fucked if i lived in los angeles county. they have hospitals up there where i could receive treatment regardless of my ability to pay for it. no such safety net exists here in orange county, because they don't give two shits about poor people... i suppose back in the day if you didn't have insurance it was because you were poor. for whatever reason, you were poor. these days though, you can have a decent paying job, and not have it. or be eligible for it but not be able to afford it (our current pickle... it would run us in the neighborhood of $700/mo and that just not doable). there are supposedly some low-cost "alternatives" here in the OC, but sliding scale isn't going to be cheap for me.

2. i also wouldn't be in this pickle if the governator, mr. schwarzenegger, hadn't vetoed SB 840, which would have provided californians a single payer system. from the los angeles times, dated september 6, 2006:

An analysis commissioned by Health Care for All California, a nonprofit group that favors universal health insurance, estimated that universal coverage would have cost an extra $17 billion, but the state would have saved $25 billion through bulk purchasing of drugs and eliminating the multiple bureaucracies now required for hospitals and private insurance companies. The report was prepared last year by the Lewin Group, a Virginia-based healthcare consulting firm.

i wonder how much insurance company money has flowed in ahhhnold's direction since he took office. (*) this is going to become an even bigger problem in this state, and sticking his head in the sand and refusing to be the one to deal with it was the behavior of a very girly man.

* - apparently it's over a million dollars.

16 October 2008

today's the day

i'm having that ultrasound the doc threatened me with a few weeks ago this afternoon. i really need it to be something that doesn't require immediate (and expensive) intervention. we're barely squeaking by right now as it is. i don't need to be dumping untold thou$ands worth of medical bills on top of my current liabilities.

those of you out there with health insurance should consider yourselves lucky today, and don't ever take your benefits for granted.

14 October 2008


so southern california is burning again. we've got optimal conditions - a weak santa ana with temps (locally) in the mid-80's, humidity in the high single digits, etc. warm, but not hot enough to turn on the a/c, so everything is coated in this mixture of ash and dust. my eyes are also full of that shit, and i'm miserable. low humidity alone will make one's eyes feel shitty, but it's 10x worse with all that crap in the air.

and, my skin is driving me nuts. i cannot drink enough to keep up with the air sucking the water out of my skin. there isn't enough lotion in the world. i'm actually ashy!

11 October 2008


i'm here with the cause
i'm holding the torch
in the corner of your room
can you hear me?
and when you're dancing and laughing
and finally living
hear my voice in your head
and think of me kindly

i usually indulge my smiths jones when wen'l is at work. any guesses as to what song that is? and is karaoke dead? cuz i could sing the shit outta some smiths tunes, that one included. i think "heaven knows i'm miserable now" would be the one i'd be best at though.

so it's saturday night, and one of the side effects of being dead crackers broke is that old married farts can't go out and live it up. so we stay home, cook something yummy (and cheap! i think dinner tonight's gonna set me back about $8), watch some shit on the tivo, smoke a doob, and have a quick plook before going to bed early. things could certainly be worse. least i have some good company!

seasonal fruits and veg - fall 08

if you're like me, you've noticed with considerable alarm the increase in your outlay for provisions. you might also have a slight weight problem like i do, and have a definite need to add additional vegetation to your diet. perhaps you're already a vegetarian (snaps to kona :D), and you've grown bored with your usual lineup of stuff.

perhaps you're already familiar with the concept of eating seasonally, and perhaps not. if not, did you know one can eat better AND cheaper by eating this way? and did you know the vast amount of stuff other than the root veggies and hard squashes to choose from? in our increasingly dire circumstances, both financial and environmental, more of us ought to be giving more thought to what we're eating, and the time of the year we're eating it. take peaches for example. i saw some at the store today. $3.99 a lb, and they're from chile, for fuck's sake. they must be scrumptious.

so, without further ado, here's the list of the stuff that's currently in season, and most of it is widely available.

after the list, you will find a recipe for one of my favorite soups. it contains three of the things on this list. give it a try on some chilly evening. we're having it tonight. it's supposed to get down into the 40's for the first time since last winter tonight, and here in california, that qualifies as cold.

artichokes (second crop)
broccoli rabe (aka rapini)
brussels sprouts
celeriac (aka celery root)
eggplant (early fall)

grapes (early fall)

green beans (early fall)
jerusalem artichokes (aka sunchokes)
kohlrabi (late fall)

mushrooms (wild)
okra (early fall)

peppers (early fall)
quince [killer with manchego cheese!]
radishes (all types)
shelling beans (early fall)
sweet potatoes

winter squash

and now, the recipe... baked potato soup! and sorry, but this won't work for vegans. lacto-ovo's, sure.

4 oz. bacon, rendered and crumbled, reserving drippings OR 3 T butter (or oil, i suppose)
6 c chicken stock, hot
4 large leftover baked potatoes, halved. pulp scooped out and put through a ricer or mashed
1½ c buttermilk
½ c sour cream
½ c freshly grated parmigiano-reggiano
2½ t salt (and don't use morton's for fuck's sake!)
1 t freshly ground pepper
2 T sherry vinegar
¼ c minced chives

in a dutch oven, over medium heat use the drippings or melt the butter and add the leeks. cook until the leeks are translucent and add the garlic. add the hot stock and whisk to combine. in a separate bowl, whisk together the potatoes, buttermilk, sour cream, and grated parmigiano-reggiano. add this mixture to the soup stirring constantly. season with salt and pepper. remove from the heat and add the sherry vinegar.

ladle into bowls and garnish with chives.

09 October 2008

did i mention that...

the suites those motherfuckers spent those nights in went for $1295.00 per? per night? per person? that's like a month worth of unemployment for one night at that pile. and believe me, nothing comes cheap at the st. reeeg. not even if one is sleeping, eating, and parking as a group, as those fucknuts certainly were.

another thing - am i the only person in the world that wants to wring that skinny, over-surgeried, can't keep her fucking yap shut mrs. mcsame's neck? she's so underfed i could probably do it with one hand. gawd, she needs to shut it. too bad her plastic surgeon can't do us all a favor and botox her fucking vocal chords, you know?

also, i'm beginnning to wonder where my 3 readers disappeared to.

07 October 2008

$400k+ for...

so this is where those AIG executives took a vacation on OUR dime: the st. regis resort and spa in monarch beach, california. now, i've spent a few nights at this place. back in the day, when wen'l was still working at neologic, the xmas festivities always took place at the st. reeeg. the only good thing i have to say about the place is that they had nice bath products (acqua di parma, to be exact). wait. one more good thing: their bars stock woodford reserve, my go-to bourbon.

anyhow, those execs, a week after we the people bailed their asses out to the tune of $85,000,000,000, flew to tacky-ass southern orange county and got spa treatments on us. ON US. motherfuckers need to pay us back and then find themselves applying for unemployment. no parachutes, golden or otherwise, for these assholes. they need to figure out how to pay their bills on $420 a week like the rest of us when we lose our jobs.

28 September 2008

yet another food meme

Got this from Eden, aka Piggyhawk :).

1) Copy this list into your blog or journal, including these instructions.
2) Bold all the items you’ve eaten.
3) Italicize any items that you would never consider eating.
4) Optional extra: Post a comment here or at http://whitetrashbbq.blogspot.com linking to your results.

1. Tomato Soup Cake (?)
2. Turducken
3. Chicken Feet
4. Sauerbraten
5. Limburger Cheese
6. Asian Pears
7. Ham Hocks
8. Ghee
9. Corn Bread
10. Buffalo Mozzarella (mmm... mozzarella di bufala)
11. Florida Stone Crabs
12. Som Tum
13. Oxtails
14. Sundried Tomatoes
15. Beef Jerky
16. Tongue
17. Calves Liver
18. Shoofly pie
19. Pulled Pork
20. Sour Cream Chocolate Frosting
21. Bison
22. Persimmons
23. Monkfish (ahh... the poor man's lobster)
24. Hoja Santa Cheese
25. Whoopee pie
26. Peking Duck
27. Sopa de Ajo - Castilian Garlic Soup
28. Pistolettes
29. Naan
30. Country Ham
31. Jambalaya
32. Anchovies
33. Black and White Cookies
34. Chives
35. Potato Pancakes
36. Boudain
37. Macoun Apples
38. Brooklyn Pizza
39. Star Fruit
40. Dosa
41. Lutefisk
42. Rhubarb
43. Scrapple
44. Huitlacoche
45. Cherry Pierogi
46. Kumquats
47. Ambrosia Salad
48. Taylor Ham
49. Sardines
50. Capers
51. Dungeness Crabs (the best crab of all, I think)
52. Grape Leaves
53. Pepper Jelly
54. Hanger Steak
55. A just picked vine ripened tomato still hot from the sun (one of my favorite things to eat is a sandwich made with one... some mayo, basil, really good white bread.... mmm!)
56. Stuffed Quahogs
57. Smoked Eggs
58. Chicken Kiev
59. Bigos
60. Andouille
61. Shropshire Blue Cheese
62. Real Moonshine
63. Yuca
64. Chicken Katsu
65. Clams on the half shell
66. Scallion Pancakes
67. Tamales
68. Maine Lobster (not my favorite though)
69. Picadillo
70. Romesco Sauce
71. Sour Cherries
72. Paella
73. Gulf Shrimp
74. Empanadas
75. Fluff
76. Ostrich
77. Wild Blueberries
78. Skate
79. Black-eyed Peas
80. Hatch Chile Peppers
81. Morels
82. Water Chestnuts
83. Massaman Curry
84. Goose
85. Jamon Serrano
86. Knish
87. Quail Eggs
88. Gyoza
89. Conch
90. Rutabaga
91. Turtle
92. Salsify
93. Hummus
94. Ceviche
95. Barbecue Baby Back Ribs
96. Parmigiano-Reggiano
97. Pine Nuts
98. Basmati Rice
99. Pickled Herring
100. Kohlrabi

i'm a little late to the party..

but i just discovered i kinda dig that tv show "heroes".

i think being forced to watch like 7 episodes this weekend is what's responsible.

i feel like an utter dork.

anyhoo, in other news, i've been a bit under the weather lately. something called *bacterial parotitis*. the parotid glands are the largest of the three sets of salivary glands. i went to the doc wednesday, and she thought it was either 1. an infection, and she wrote me a prescription for augmentin, the biggest horse pill you've ever seen; 2. a (most likely) benign tumor. well, i've since discovered it must be the first option because i don't think a tumor would be responding to antibiotics, and this thing in my neck has dramatically reduced in size since i started on the bug juice.

i'm going to make another appointment to see her towards the end of this week so she can see how things are going, etc.

as you may know, i am w/o health insurance, and i think i may have just dodged a bullet.

30 August 2008

a food meme!

Found this over at Culinary Adventures of a New Wife. Click the title of this post to visit!

Here's the simple rules:
1. Copy this list into your blog or journal, including these instructions.
2. Bold all the items you’ve eaten.
3. Italicize any items that you would never consider eating.
4. Optional extra: Post a comment here at www.verygoodtaste.co.uk linking to your results.

Omnivore's 100

1. Venison
2. Nettle tea
3. Huevos rancheros
4. Steak tartare
5. Crocodile
6. Black pudding
7. Cheese fondue
8. Carp
9. Borscht
10. Baba ghanoush
11. Calamari
12. Pho
13. PB&J sandwich
14. Aloo gobi
15. Hot dog from a street cart
16. Epoisses
17. Black truffle
18. Fruit wine made from something other than grapes
19. Steamed pork buns
20. Pistachio ice cream
21. Heirloom tomatoes
22. Fresh wild berries
23. Foie gras
24. Rice and beans
25. Brawn, or head cheese
26. Raw Scotch Bonnet pepper (actually it was habañero)
27. Dulce de leche
28. Oysters (and apparently, I'm allergic!)
29. Baklava
30. Bagna cauda
31. Wasabi peas
32. Clam chowder in a sourdough bowl
33. Salted lassi
34. Sauerkraut (ICK!!)
35. Root beer float
36. Cognac with a fat cigar. Cognac, yes, but no cigar.
37. Clotted cream tea
38. Vodka jelly/Jell-O
39. Gumbo
40. Oxtail
41. Curried goat
42. Whole insects
43. Phaal
44. Goat’s milk
45. Malt whisky from a bottle worth £60/$120 or more
46. Fugu
47. Chicken tikka masala
48. Eel
49. Krispy Kreme original glazed doughnut
50. Sea urchin
51. Prickly pear
52. Umeboshi
53. Abalone
54. Paneer
55. McDonald’s Big Mac Meal
56. Spaetzle
57. Dirty gin martini
58. Beer above 8% ABV
59. Poutine
60. Carob chips (once and only once... faux chocolate sucks!)
61. S’mores
62. Sweetbreads
63. Kaolin - um, that's CLAY!
64. Currywurst
65. Durian
66. Frogs’ legs
67. Beignets, churros, elephant ears or funnel cake
68. Haggis
69. Fried plantain
70. Chitterlings, or andouillette
71. Gazpacho
72. Caviar and blini
73. Louche absinthe
74. Gjetost, or brunost
75. Roadkill
76. Baijiu
77. Hostess Fruit Pie
78. Snail
79. Lapsang souchong
80. Bellini
81. Tom yum
82. Eggs Benedict
83. Pocky (?!)
84. Tasting menu at a three-Michelin-star restaurant.
85. Kobe beef
86. Hare
87. Goulash
88. Flowers
89. Horse
90. Criollo chocolate
91. Spam *hurl*
92. Soft shell crab
93. Rose harissa
94. Catfish
95. Mole poblano
96. Bagel and lox
97. Lobster Thermidor
98. Polenta
99. Jamaican Blue Mountain coffee
100. Snake

29 August 2008

and now back to our regular programming

well hello there. first post in ages that wasn't a meme, eh?

been sorta busy, and not really in the mood to do any blogging, the usual excuse.

anyhoo, what about my girl? rachel's getting her own show as soon as the freakshow that will be the rethuglican national convention is over! i'm so stoked :)

now, about the democratic national convention: i'm kinda glad they waited till wednesday to serve up the red meat, and i'm glad it was bubba who dished up the first serving. that speech made me remember why i liked him as much as i did. biden did have a lot to live up to after that, but he did just fine. hillary's speech sorta surprised me. michelle's didn't. obama's speech was one for the ages, but the speech that got me moist was al gore's, even though my heart breaks every time i see him.

i hate aching for what could have been.

14 August 2008

les answers!

meme answers:

1. god only knows - the beach boys
2. bring the noise - pe
3. the boondocks - asheru
4. hail hail - pearl jam
5. the ledge - the replacements
6. so whatcha want - the beastie boys
7. wiser time - the black crowes
8. suite: judy blue eyes - csn
9. hot! hot! hot! - the cure
10. alone again or - the damned
11. ants marching - dmb
12. september - earth wind & fire
13. shadowboxer - fiona apple
14. shimmer - fuel
15. go go gadget gospel - gnarls barkley
16. all these things that i've done - the killers
17. debaser - pixies
18. j'aurais toujours faim de toi - the police
19. it could be sweet - portishead
20. spagetti western - primus

13 August 2008

all the answers tomorrow!

to konagod - there is some beasties.

to the biz - i need song titles for the 2 artists you guessed right.

also, i've apparently lost 3 of my 5 readers.

12 August 2008

yet another meme

ganked this ages ago from tense teacher. if you're looking at it, consider yourself tagged.

les rules:
1. put your mp3 player or computer music player on random.
2. post the first four lines from the first 20 songs that play, no matter how embarrassing the song (skip repeat artists & instrumentals *duh*).
3. post, and let your friends guess which song and artist the lines come from.
4. NO googling!

1. i may not always love you
but long as there are stars above you
you never need to doubt it
i'll make you so sure about it

2. bass - how low can you go?
death row, what a brother know?
once again back is the incredible rhyme animal
the incredible d, public enemy number one

3. i am the stone that the builder refused
i am the visual, the inspiration that made ladies sing the blues
i'm the spark that makes your idea bright
the same spark that lights the dark so you can know your left from your right

4. ah, is there room for both of us?
both of us apart?
are we bound out of obligation?
is that all we've got?

5. all eyes look up to me
high above the filthy streets
heed no bullhorn when it calls
watch me fly and die, watch me fall

6. just plug me in just like i was eddie harris
you're eating crazy cheese like you'd think i'm from paris
you know i get fly you think i get high
you know that i'm gone and i'm a tell you all why

7. no time left now for shame
horizon behind me, no more pain
windswept stars blink and smile
another song, another mile

8. it's getting to the point
where i'm no fun anymore
i am sorry
sometimes it hurts so badly

9. the first time i saw lightning strike
i saw it underground
six deep feet below the street
the sky came crashing down

10. yeah said its alright
i wont forget
all the times
i waited patiently for you

11. he wakes up in the morning
does his teeth bite to eat and hes rolling
never changes a thing
the week ends the week begins

12. do you remember the 21st night of september?
love was changing the minds of pretenders
while chasing the clouds away
our hearts were ringing

13. once my lover, now my friend.
what a cruel thing to pretend.
what a cunning way to condescend.
once my lover, now my friend.

14. she calls me from the cold
just when i was low, feeling short of stable
and all that she intends
and all she keeps inside, isn't on the label

15. i'm well on my way
i'm almost everything
and this is my day
you make me want to say

16. when there's nowhere else to run
is there room for one more son
one more son
if you can hold on

17. got me a movie, i want you to know
slicing up eyeballs, i want you to know
girly so groovy, i want you to know
don't know about you, but i am un chien andalusia

18. rien de dormier cette nuit
je veux de toi
jusque'à ce que je sois sec
mais nos corps sont tout mouillés

19. i don't want to hurt you
for no reason have i but fear
and i ain't guilty of the crimes you accuse me of
but i'm guilty of fear

20. why do we do this c.g. and i?
every night vegetables,
minds numbed up by thc.
i've got my pen, c.g. the remote.

11 July 2008

title not necessary

this was a ? on a bulletin posted on myspace by my cousin halie:

17. I've come to realize that my dad...is and has never been around or involved resulting in us not trying either!

i could have answered the same way. another ? was something like "i've come to realize my mom...." . she answered "a saint". her mom might just be, considering how very normal and well-adjusted halie seems. i don't think i'd be answering that one the same way. my mom was most definitely mortal. she did a bunch of things she should have regretted if she didn't.

"normal" to me ended up being really twisted and kind of sick. passive-aggressive. unsupportive. neglectful. i learned it was all ok. it was ok that people treated me like shit. it was ok if they were nonexistent and uninvolved. it was ok if all the love and kindness in a relationship originated with me.

mind you, i ended up getting out of my relationship with her what i needed. it took her getting cancer and coming thisfuckingclose to dying for me to get it. we had the relationship i'd needed for the last 9 years she lived. i bet she'd say that was the best phase for her too.

i've never had the relationship i needed (or even wanted, for that matter) with my father, and i never will. believe me, i've tried. all my life it's seemed like one thing or another was more important to him than i was, and when that thing ended up being his precious harley davidsons, i threw in the towel. the man wasn't even going to inform me of his impending nuptials until my brother guilted him into it. can you believe that shit? in his eyes, i was supposed to find out about it when the invite showed up in the mail, 4 days before the blessed event!

this uninvolved, uninterested thing is something that runs in the family. i think i might have a touch of it myself. i do not stay in touch with both sides of my family as well as i should. i think finding halie on myspace and seeing just a bit of who she's become is what finally made me uncomfortable with my uninvolvement. praise the psm for technology, eh?

i think july 11th is as good a day to make a resolution as january 1st, so i'm going to resolve to call a few peeps more often, and email the ones i can much more often.

10 July 2008

well.. i'm sposed to be writing something more pleasant than i did yesterday.

i did have a rather pleasant surprise when i was out doing some errands about an hour ago. the cheap arco up on the corner has gone down another $.02/gal on gas. i put $40 in the tank on tuesday and paid $4.33/gal and now it's $4.31. too bad i didn't wait a couple days to gas up, no? the tank wasn't empty or anything, but i figured it would start going back up again, so i gassed the beast. and now it's gone down again.

are they trying to placate us, now that we all know that mcsame and all his ilk have no idea how much a gallon of gas costs? one wonders if they know the price of everything has gone up, not just gas, but anything that requires schlepping around in a vehicle of any kind (see yesterday's post about the poor ppl's french store).

it was even muggier here today, and more than one weather-related website is saying we might get t-storms the next couple days. wtF?! i'm already sweatin gallons, yo! too bad i can't figure out how to run my car on it!

did some work on the house today. both the funky bathrooms. i repurposed some knickknacks i had, and started working on the soon-to-be-rehabbed living room. i need to get to home depot and pick up some paint chips.

lastly, i need your help! one of my best pals and her family has moved into a new place (in IRVINE!! *hurling for her*), and i'm at a loss as to what to get her for a housewarming present. wen'l and i went all out when they got their very first place (like the gifts came in that blue box that sets girls' hearts all atwitter), so i'm wanting to be a little less grand this time. if any of you have a suggestion, please feel free to leave them in the comments.

09 July 2008

no babies smiled at me today!

god did tarjjjjjjjjjjjjay ever suck today. i had to get some tp, swiffer crap, and assorted other nonperishables. the parking lot was a zoo. i should have just gone on to the grocery store and gotten the tp (the only thing i was actually out of), but oh no! dipshit me had to find a spot and go inside. i don't know about your local poor people's french store, but mine is trying to conserve electricity by not keeping the thermostat turned down so low. add to that the humidity. for real, it's like a portly man's crotch around here lately. and, throw in a store packed with other sweaty motherfuckers. the back of my head was dripping when i finally got out.

somehow i managed to spend almost $75. i bought some swiffer wet doojies, the pads for the swiffer mop, 8 rolls of tp, granite countertop spray, stainless steel spray and dish soap. oh, and a copy of dwell. i love me some shelter mags. that's another story though.

we're so fucked. i've noticed that everything has gone up in price. just a bit, mind you, but a bit nonetheless. the same cart of shit cost me about $5 less a couple months ago, and i shop a lot. every fucking cart is costing me at least $5 more. add to that the truly obscene amount a tank of gas is costing me these days, and i bet i'm spending a good $300 a month more than i'd like to. mind you, i don't have any debt, but i'd like to be putting at least half the money i'm spending but not wanting to to better fucking use! savings, roth iras, whatever.

and... on a slightly unrelated subject... i'm still pissed at sen. obama. why does he have to be such a spineless wimp about this fisa shit? and why isn't it also frying his ass that it's poking far too many holes in the 4th amendment? i'd set up an automatic donation thingy that i had to undo because of that shit. i'm going to protest his dipshittery with my pocketbook. perhaps i'll throw some more $ at him when i calm down. even considering my current need to slap some sense into him, i realize he needs to get elected in november. no way can that old man with the cancer on the side of his face (cuz come on.. what IS that lump on the left side of his face?) get handed that job. i have a cousin who's already been to iraq that'll be back in country within the next couple weeks. his tour's sposed to be like 15 months. and now the iraqis themselves are saying there needs to be a timetable. the shit needs to be over with, and not yesterday. like 1897 yesterdays ago.

k, that's my rant for the week. i'll bb tomorrow with something more pleasant, k?

sorry Eden, but i heart snakes

i got this from Eden. if you're looking at it, you're tagged!

Accent: None. Californians don't have one.
Breakfast or no breakfast: That depends. If someone else is making it, sure! If not, then normally I don't partake.
Chore I don’t care for: Cleaning the bathrooms. Two men live in this house. Try to imagine the amount of body hair that can accumulate. Also, keep in mind I tidy up the shitters about 2x/week. The hair and the toilets make me wanna barf.
Dog or Cat: Dog. I loathe cats.
Essential Electronics: Cell phone, puter, 60” of tasty hi-def goodness, PS3.
Favorite Cologne: Acqua di Parma. I love how it smells, all citrus-y and slightly soapy. Chanel Allure Sensuelle. I can't really explain the smell of that one though. And, oddly enough, Acqua di Gio for men. I like the broads' version of it fine, but the dudes' is even more delicious. On occasion I sneak some of my bro's. I figure it's only fair since I introduced him to it and it's his sig. scent now.
Gold or Silver: Platinum?
Handbag I carry most often: My birthday bag (see below!).
Insomnia: Not normally, but sometimes. Depends on whether I spoke to my father that day or not.
Job Title: DG!
Kids: No thanks!
Living Arrangements: I live with my husband and my brother in my father's house. Cheap rent is cheap rent, kids. The 3 of us split the smallish mortgage on the place, and it makes sense w/ Wen'ls commute.
Most Admirable Trait: My ability to tell people some truth they don't want to hear but need to hear anyway.
Naughtiest Childhood Behavior: I wish I'd had some naughty childhood behavior. Perhaps it would have been a happier childhood if I had.
Overnight hospital stays: Concussion-induced coma in 1974. 72-hr observation in 1986. I wasn't crazy enough for them to keep me any longer than that. *lol*
Phobias: I don't know if it's exactly a phobia or not, but... I have vertigo and whenever I'm on a bridge of any length, I get all panic-y. The Richmond Bridge in the Bay Area was almost my undoing once. What's weird is I went over the Golden Gate on the same trip with no ill effects.
Quote: “The ink of a scholar is worth a thousand times more than the blood of a martyr.” - Lupe Fiasco
Reason to smile: Wen'l getting home from work, ANY baby smiling at me (hey, just cuz I don't want one doesn't mean I'm immune to their charms!), the sun and an ocean breeze.
Siblings: A half brother I've never met (try to guess which of my parents spawned him! *lol*) and the bro I live w/.
Time I wake up: Whenever the hell I want!
Unusual Talent or Skill: I paint well. Rather, I copy other people's shit really well.
Vegetable I Refuse to Eat: Any that's overcooked. If they're not cooked to death, I'll eat any veggie.
Worst Habit: I smoke. My second worst habit is that I keep threatening to quit and have yet to.
X-rays: Oh, I've had a few. My last was a chest x-ray. The doc was afraid I might have pneumonia. Before that, it was my lower back.
Yummy Stuff: Boeuf bourguignon (waaaaaaaaay too hot for that these days!), tacos de carnitas, any ice cream that involves chocolate and/or coffee, tarte tatin, mac n cheese, spaghetti alla carbonara, homemade pizza.
Zoo Animal I Like Most: I love snakes, and they always have the big ones at the zoo!

04 July 2008

independence day

i do love this country. i love it in spite of hating it sometimes, as though it were a person.

i know it has a heart like one, and i know it isn't just in the midwest or in the south, no matter how much some people in those parts of the country would like the rest of us to believe.

i wish sen. obama would stop tracking so hard to the center. he should be remembering to dance with who brung him, you know? but i realize he'd about 10x better than what we have now, and better than mccain could ever think of being. at least obama realizes this country does best when people like you and me aren't struggling under the weight of our ever-increasing expenditures. when our wages aren't stagnant. trickle down economics has been proven to be a joke. trickle UP economics works though.

i just wish our collective first impulse wasn't to take our newfound wealth and sink it into mcmansions in the burbs, and big cars and more stuff that we'll have to find cabinet space for, you know?

anyway, happy 232nd birthday america.

01 July 2008

troo dat

got this in an email from my aunt. came very close to spraying my monitor with iced coffee when i saw it.

03 June 2008

my political compass

i saw this over at balls and walnuts, and thought i'd take the test myself. go to his blog to check out his results if you'd like (and if you'd like some context... he was patient enough to save some pics i'm not bothering with!)... the link is in the sidebar.

perhaps more later!

02 June 2008

carnitas de julia

this is the easiest thing i cook. it's great for the warmer months too. all you need equipment-wise is a crock pot. the ingredients and part of the procedure i found in gourmet magazine. i love me some foodie porn. anyway.. it was written by amy finley, the winner of last year's food tv contest. i made it, and i could tell it was lacking one thing... a certain crispiness. also, no garlic, and that's a crime.

there's one thing in it that might not be available in just any grocery store though. mexican oregano. if you don't have that or can't get it, i'd throw a bay leaf in instead. or, omit it entirely. it'll still be tres delish.

your mise-en-place:

1 5 lb boneless pork shoulder (butt end preferably), cut in about 5 1½" thick slabs
1 T salt (and use good salt dammit! i use gray salt from trader joe's)
1 T pepper (and i use a mill and it takes forever, but it's worth it)
1 T dried mexican oregano (or one bay leaf, or not)
2 good-sized onions, sliced into ¼" thick rings

4 large cloves garlic, smashed

one slow cooker

put the pork into the crock part of your slow cooker. in a small bowl, combine salt, pepper and mexican oregano. toss with the pork in the crock. place slightly broken up onion rings on top. place cover on crock and cook on low heat for 7-8 hrs.

remove to a plate to cool enough to shred. shred into large-ish chunks.

place a 12" (or larger, if you're lucky!) saute pan over med-hi heat with 1 T vegetable oil. this is inportant! do not forget that teeny little bit of oil. it will make all the difference in your crispies. when it's just starting to smoke, throw in all the pork and resist the urge to mess with it too much. just leave it be for about 4 mins. then bust it up a little and flip it over. give it another 4 mins. and you're good to go.

i usually serve this with steamed corn tortillas (handmade if you live where you can find them *swoon*), avocado slices and pico de gallo. i think it's the best thing i cook.

29 April 2008

mass graves for the pump and the price is set

what the hell does obama have to do?

hillary's made me lose all respect for her. she's doing mcsame's job for him for one thing. for another, she's with him on this gas tax holiday bullshit, and saying obama's out of touch with middle america... because he's got a brain in his head and realizes that 3 months of the roads and bridges in this country not being tended to will fuck us in the ass, sideways, in the long run.

why must she pander so? or, alternately, where the hell does she think the money to do that maintanence on our already mcgyver'd infrastructure is going to come from? certainly not the defense budget!

instead, we're talking about his pastor? and someone he sat on a board with? how people really ARE bitter? (see a couple posts down) how about they let the man talk about what he wants to, the shit we sometimes don't want to hear, but need to? continuing to ask him bullshit questions about shit that came to light almost 2 months ago now? how about hillary's little senior moment? where she "misspoke" *rme* about being forced to make a corkscrew landing under heavy sniper fire? or mcsame and his good buddy, the rev. hagge? you know, the one that said god inflicted hurricane katrina on new orleans because they were a bit too *friendly* to homosexuals? you know, just to be fair.

the movie ran through me
the glamour subdued me
the tabloid untied me
i'm empty please fill me
mister anchor assure me
that Baghdad is burning
your voice it is so soothing
that cunning mantra of killing
i need you my witness
to dress this up so bloodless
to numb me and purge me now
of thoughts of blaming you
yes the car is our wheelchair
my witness your coughing
oily silence mocks the legless boys
who travel now in coffins
on the corner
the jury's sleepless
we found your weakness
and it's right outside your door

- "testify", rage against the machine

anyhoo, where was i? oh yeah... i was bitching about the media, the traditional, ie multi-national conglomerate owned, media. why do they think we give half a fuck about that shit? or is it that they know there is a certain percentage of the population out there that they know will buy what they're selling? either way, i feel insulted. i, like an ever-larger percentage of americans, get my news from places i click to. if this swill is what they're going to inflict upon us, then may they perish from their own uselessness.

i'm fast approaching 40 here. i drive a car that's 12 years old and gets shitty mileage on the highway! i will keep paying my damn taxes. the taxes aren't the problem. our weak dollar and our petroleum-dependent administration are the damn problem. our army being in iraq keeping that oil in the ground. the chimperor said today that not enough oil is being produced. no shit, sherlock! you've got a blue-chip MBA and you just now realized that? when will you realize why? january 20, 2009?

btw, that song came out in 1999.

27 April 2008


well i was just reading a blog that had a post on it called *coach whore*. you, my 3 faithful readers, know that i am a coach slut from waaaaaaaaay back.

i meant to post this right after my birthday. i got a bag from wen'l, and bought myself the matching wallet with the happy birthday coupon i got from coach ($50 off any $150 or larger purchase!). my bag was also purchased with a coupon. coach just loves me apparently.

anyhoo... here's the pics i ganked off coach.com. one of these days i'm going to gather all my various handbags and wallets and take their picture.

the bag:

the wallet:

and... i might have mentioned this before, but wen'l picked that bag out all by himself! he rawks almost as hard as i do, eh?

17 April 2008


i left yesterday saying i need to go gas the beast, etc...

so i'm at the arco on the corner of dale and ball and the place is packed. it's one of the more reasonably priced gas stations around, so it's really no surprise that i have to wait for a pump. my fellow patrons are all grumbling about how little gas they're getting for their $50 (13 gallons here, and i got the *regular* unleaded). they sounded a bit, uhh... i dunno... bitter?

i don't believe in guns or god, so i can't cling (oops, does that make me elitist?) to either of those things, but i'm glad i have my DH. i'm sure he's glad he's got me too. it's better being bitter with someone you love, you know?

another thing i'm bitter about: the arrival of our impending "stimulus package". i wish we weren't so dead crackers broke so i could donate about half of it to mr. obama. that seems about the biggest FUCK YOU statement i can make to the bushies and their ilk in re trying to buy me off with a check for $600.

but just like everyone else i know, i'll be spending that money on shit like rent and the electric bill, not making political contributions or paying for the 3 day weekend out of town wen'l and i could surely stand.

what will you, dear reader(s), be doing when you get stimulated?