shit in my house, a meme

snagged from tense teacher:


What kind of soap is in your bathtub right now? Sea Island Cotton body wash from Bath & Body Works (me) and Sea Salt Body Scrub from Anthony Logistics (Wen'l)
Do you have any watermelon in your refrigerator? No.
What would you change about your living room? Rip up the carpet and refinish the hardwood floors, and I'd paint. Also, I'd get a slipcover for the inherited couch.
Are the dishes in your dishwasher clean or dirty? There aren't many, and they're dirty. Even though we have a dishwasher, we still do most of them by hand.
What is in your fridge? We just got back from Trader Joe's, so there's fruit, beer (three kinds... it's Labor Day weekend after all!), salumi/charcuterie, cheese (fromage/formaggio? *lol*), milk, meat for carne asada, plenty of green veg, eggs and breakfast-type pork products.
White or wheat bread? Wen'ls homemade brioche, so white.
What is on top of your refrigerator? The cutting board, Wen'ls lunch bucket and the crock containing his sourdough starter.
What color or design is on your shower curtain? It's embroidered white cotton.
How many plants are in your home? No plants inside the house. Plenty outside though.
Is your bed made right now? Yep. I make it every day.
Comet or Soft Scrub? Barkeeper's Friend.
Is your closet organized? Other than the shelf containing my Coach collection (all in their dustbags I might add) it's a total fucking mess, and there isn't really that much in it. Most of my clothes are of the fold-up variety.
Can you describe your flashlight? If I could find it, I could.
Do you drink out of glass or plastic most of the time at home? Water gets dispensed from the fridge into a plastic glass. I'd drink sweet tea out of the same glass. Coke always gets drank straight from the can.
Do you have iced tea made in a pitcher right now? No, but as hot as it's been lately, I should have a pitcher of sun tea in there. Maybe I'll go get a pitcher started right now.
If you have a garage, is it cluttered? Um, yes, and most of the shit in it isn't even ours!
Curtains or blinds? Actually, most of the windows only have valances on them.
How many pillows do you sleep with? Normally one, but sometimes none.
Do you sleep with any lights on at night? Nope. The darker it is, the better.
How often do you vacuum? Wen'l does it every Saturday.
Standard toothbrush or electric? Old-school Oral-B.
What color is your toothbrush? It's pink and white, like always. My flosser gizmo is pink and I like them to match.
Do you have a welcome mat on your front porch? Yep. It's one of those coir ones and it does indeed say “Welcome” on it.
What is in your oven right now? Just the pizza stone.
Is there anything under your bed? This month's copy of Real Simple. That's it.
Chore you hate doing the most? Vacuuming and mopping.
What retro items are in your home? Well, the toaster looks sort of retro? It's a Cuisinart and only a couple years old though.
Do you have a separate room that you use as an office? Yep, and praise jeebus for it. I'd hate to have our computers and shit cluttering up another room.
How many mirrors are in your home? Let's see... 2 in the bathrooms, one in the the living room and one in the bedroom. 4.
Do you have any hidden emergency money around your home? There's money, but not it's not hidden nor is it for emergencies. I have about $40 in change that I need to take to the bank soon.
What color are your walls? Oh boy... the TV room is the color of a camel hair coat, the kitchen is “hopsack”*, the living room and dining room are sage green, the office is “tour eiffel”*, the half bath is “biscuit”**, the foyer and hallway are white, the full bath and bedroom are both blue (different, though related, shades) and the guest room is “thyme”.
Do you keep any kind of protection weapons in your home? Would Wen'ls 10” chef's knife count?
What does your home smell like right now? Cannabis de mist (snort) and fabric softener sheets.
Fave candle scent? Diptyque Heliotrope.
What kind of pickles (if any) are in your refrigerator right now? Sliced and whole kosher dills.
What color is your favorite bible? I'm an atheist. Hello!
Ever been on your roof? Hell no!
Do you own a stereo? There's a receiver in the home theater package, but other than that, our tunes are played on our computers. Mine has 5.1 surround sound though.
How many tvs do you have? Two. One hi-def and one lo-def.
How many house phones? Two. The cordless and the one in the kitchen.
Do you have a housekeeper? I fucking wish!
What style do you decorate in? Minimalist.
Do you like solid colors in furniture or prints? Both?
Is there a smoke detector in your home? One in every bedroom (ie, three), one in the kitchen and one in the TV room. The batteries get replaced every “spring forward”.
Case of fire, what are the items you'd grab if you only could make 1 quick trip? Wedding photos and wedding rings. I'd miss the hell out of my stand mixer though.

* = taupe. tour eiffel is darker than hopsack.
** = beige.
one of my biggest pet peeves is how totally fucking clever everyone has to be when naming colors.

feel free to gank, k?