01 March 2006

re: *cranking a blaster*

Freethinker said: Your blog should have "Smell-o-vision" installed ... but NOT for this post!
12:04 PM

yes, my blog SHOULD have smell-o-vision... but then y'all would have my weight problem too. i eat like royalty and have the figure to prove it. *lol*

Eden said: you should know I come and look at this photo a little too often
2:31 PM

umm... that's kinda scary Eden. i know your feelings about the shrub are similar to mine, and, well... i don't think i ever need to look at that pic again. not only cuz it's fairly obvious that chimpy is rippin a fluffy one, but because of the look on his cunty wife's face. i always suspected laura was a bitch, but when i first saw that pic, i knew the rigamarole about men wanting to marry mommy might be true.

i have something scary of my own to add, however. one night, after eating like royalty, i was sitting out on the porch with Wen'l having a smoke. needing to fart in the worst way. sooo... i did the guy thing and lifted an ass cheek and out it came!

that's not the scary part tho. the scary part is that i felt like i'd been cheated. that the whole lifting one side of one's ass trick was handed down from fathers to sons, and to hell with the daughters. somehow we had it in our heads that they were making a big production out of their flatulence, and we suffered needlessly in our ignorance.

last night i was having another smoke on the porch with Wen'l, and i said this: "if i ever had a daughter, i'd teach her the fart trick." and i would, just as soon as she was able to comprehend.

1 comment:

Eden said...

"Cunty" -- heh. I love that.

Hey -- I have a whole story about farting here. Enjoy.

My daughter? Two and a half. Can already make fart noises with her mouth on her arm. The other night she let loose a real one and said, "What was that?" I said, "You farted. Your butt made noise." She thought about it a second and went, "Okay."

Farts are funny. W farts? Especially funny. I bet he farts backwards.