so... my dad took off on a trip about 3 weeks after mom's funeral, to parts east. he was supposed to be back the 27th of last month. he's getting home today, probably around 3 this afternoon.
he spent over $10k on this little adventure, and only paid to put a roof over his head about 5 nights total. i have no idea how he spent so much.
you may be asking how i know how much he's blown. the dork put me in charge of paying his bills in his absence, that's how. in fact, i'll probably keep doing it once he's returned. he's not the most responsible motherfucker in the world, and i don't want to listen to him whine about being foreclosed upon because he forgot to pay his mortgage.
my mom left him in pretty good shape financially. a nicely loaded 401(k), other retirement savings, a portfolio too dependent upon mutual funds (and i have advised him to get out of those at his earliest convenience... i have problems with investment options which reserve the bulk of their earnings for the fund and for the financial *advisor*). life insurance. hell, even his social security benefits will increase.
he's been extremely foolish in re his spending since her death. a new pick'm up truck that he had to put new wheels and tires on and have lowered. he already had 2 cars, and still does actually. a harley-davidson... he had a motorcycle about 15 yrs ago... that he totaled in about 2 weeks. probably looking at some broad's ass and not paying attention to traffic. i would think his reflexes and shit have only diminished in the ensuing years. he has absolutely no business having a motorcycle now, at any rate. southern california traffic is far worse than it was then, and if he thinks he's going to be riding the damn contraption around here... i'm gonna have to put a good hurt on him.
anyhoo, i'm not going to itemize his spending. i haven't even gotten to the truly frightening stuff. suffice it to say, he's quite compulsive. my problem is this: how do i get him to understand that he needs to be thinking how to reduce his expenses, not add to them? i mean, the insurance alone on that stupid motorcycle is almost $1500 a year.
he's 65 years old. his health isn't the greatest, but he's not going to drop dead in a week, or a month, or even a year. he's gonna be destitute, and living under a bridge eating generic dog food if he's not careful though. he was never responsible for the financial shit (that was my mom), and he has absolutely no idea how much it costs to live here, even frugally.
i have no idea how to broach the subject with him. his tendency in matters such as this is to become defensive and accusatory, ie "you're trying to run my life!"
how is it that i tell him i'm worried about him, and his spending habits and make it perfectly clear that "running his life" is a responsibility i neither want nor need? how i'd rather not spend the rest of his life making sure he's not penniless and homeless? how i'd like it very much if he'd grow the fuck up already?